TRUE STORY...

...
"Hey guys, do you know who the Monkees are"- Me

"Not Really"- Teens

"For serious?"- Me

"Never heard of them"- Some teens

"Davey Jones died, Adam, you look upset about this"-  Me

"Honestly, I have never heard of them"- Adam

"Oh, well Davey Jones died"- Me

...silence- teens

"They were like my Jonas Brothers"- Me

"OHHH!!!!!"- Teens together.

I.am.so.old. :)

We Found Out on Monday

... that we are having another little boy.  We kind of suspected it all along, the Wilkersons make boys, and we were quite excited.  We have no idea what we are going to name him, we had a girl name locked down, but boy names are harder for us.  


When we found out that it was a boy, what kept running through my mind is that my husband has two sons.  He can look at ‘his boys’. He is and will be the perfect father for raising young men (well, we are still teaching him how necessary it is to ALWAYS open doors, but other than that, he is golden).  I joked with Aaron that the baby cookin’ in me will be the quarterback and lil’ Aaron will be the lineman that defends him.  He can be the blindside.   I am so excited that my husband will have two sons.


As the day went on, what kept running through my mind is that my son has a brother.  I have been telling lil’ Aaron for the past 2 days that he will have a little brother. I have thought of them playing together, rough housing, tattling on each other.  I am a sentimental girl, so I have thought about when they are older, just passed the teen years, and really they begin to depend on each other as friends.  I adore the fact that God saw fit to give us two boys so close in age and I cannot WAIT to hear them play together.  I am already imagining how funny it will be when they are in their room and won’t go to sleep and we have to call them out into the family room for a ‘talking-to’.   I am so excited that my son will have a little brother.


But just this morning, 2 days later, I realized how excited I am that I will have two boys.  I will refer to them as ‘my boys’.  And I will make them come and give their mama kisses.  Hopefully, we will raise them to be protective of girls and to be good gentleman.  Is it wrong, that part of me wants them to grow up to be mama’s boys?  I am going to have two sons.  They will no doubt be taller than me.  They will both have darker completion and probably be smart like their daddy.  I hope they are a little nerdy, a little athletic, a little rebellious and rambunctious.  I hope and pray so desperately that we can do a good job teaching them to love Jesus and that their destination is heaven not earth.  I am SO excited to be the mother of two boys.


I can’t believe how God has blessed us in our marriage so far.  I wish I lived a more sincere spirit of thanksgiving for everything that we have been given.  I need to stop complaining so much, I need to face each day with joy.  


I can’t believe I have two boys on loan for their journey towards heaven.  It is just craziness. I am one.blessed.mama.

5 Things I Need You to Know...

...Even if you don’t agree with my thoughts on the HHS Mandate.

I know a bunch of people that read my blog/check my facebook don’t agree with me regarding the HHS Mandate- however, even if you are one of those people, you should read this post.  TRUST ME.  After you read it, you should be savvy when watching news coverage/listening to conversation about this issue.  There is a lot about this mandate that is greatly misunderstood…I shall discuss them now.

1^st - This issue is not about birth control

This is so important and I REALLY hope people understand this.  The issue I have with the HHS mandate has little to do with birth control or sterilization.  If you have eight million years and want to go through my posts, you will see, until this happened, I have never once discussed birth control on my wall.  I have been a CYM for almost 8 years and although I talk ALL.THE.TIME about the Catholic plan for sexuality, I have never been one to openly discuss birth control at regular youth group meetings(ask me why and I will tell you, it makes sense).  Almost all of my friends/family (excluding FUSers of course) make it known that they use birth control and sometimes have encouraged me/my family members to use it, and I have never once tried to change their minds (but am always willing to discuss if anyone asks).  There is an awesome article currently going around fb about why the Church is right concerning birth control…and I have NOT reposted.  Why?  Because it has NOTHING to do with why the HHS Mandate is so horrifying to me.
The reason I have not posted about birth control/sterilization, don’t teach exclusively on it and the reason I don’t try to change my friends/families minds?  Because I don’t think it is an effective way to spread the message regarding the beauty of NFP.   I witness it, I will answer questions if people approach me, but I just don’t think it is effective to ‘try to convince’ people through facebook, etc…
THE HHS MANDATE ISSUE IS NOT ABOUT BIRTH CONTROL/STERILIZATION.  What the Church is saying is that She should not have to pay for Her employees (either directly or indirectly) through Her institutions, to do something She has deemed morally unacceptable. 

2^nd - The Roman Catholic Church is not trying to take away your ‘right’ to birth control/sterilization

The Church is not saying you can’t use it if you work for her institutions.  The Church is not saying that you don’t have a ‘right’ to birth control.  What the Church is saying is that She should not have to pay for Her employees (either directly or indirectly) through Her institutions, to do something She has deemed morally unacceptable. 

3^rd- The Roman Catholic Church is not trying to deny you ‘access’ to birth control/sterilization

This is the most ridiculous thing that news station after news station is reporting.  Guess what?  EVERYONE has easy access to birth control.  When I say easy, I mean easy.  It is not hard, in this country, to get birth control and to get it cheap.  For the administration/news reports/or my favorite, ‘Catholic experts’ to suggest that the Bishops have an issue with ‘access’ to birth control is REDONKULOUS.  Can we really not see through this?  What the Church is saying is that She should not have to pay for Her employees (either directly or indirectly) through Her institutions, to do something She has deemed morally unacceptable. 

4^th- Birth Control/Sterilization is NOT the only form of preventative medicine regarding pregnancy

This one really, how you say, gets my feathers in a ruffle.  Not because I think the administration is calling pregnancy a disease (in effect they are, but that is not what they mean, so I try not to capitalize on sensational things).  The reason this one RILES me up is because there is another way to prevent pregnancy.  It is actually really simple to understand, though not always easy to do (trust me and my 30 years of abstinence before I met Aaron).  One can prevent pregnancy by not having sex.  When I listen to Mr. President and his friends make it appear that the ONLY way to prevent pregnancy is through artificial birth control, I cannot handle it because I simply can’t imagine that the average American is truly listening and nodding as he speaks. Now, I get that some people use birth control for other medical reasons (which is something I can talk about later, if you’d like me to), but that is not what the administration is referring to…and we all know it.  To illustrate why this upsets me so, I would like to tell a story…
Yesterday, I went to the hospital for ultra sound and had to fill a prescription.  Due to acid reflux, something I have always dealt with but is exaggerated in pregnancy, I had to fill a Nexium prescription.  I have to take Nexium so that acid does not burn a hole through my esophagus (and before you ask, diet does not help, we have tried).  My husband Aaron has probably the best insurance in the world, because he works for a hospital.  And with the best.insurance.possible, we still had to pay, out of pocket,  $405 to fill that prescription.  Read it again, I did say $405.  Although I think that is highway robbery, and should be explored, I am not complaining about that today.  What I am complaining about is that the administration thinks that the Catholic Church, through her institutions, should directly or indirectly pay for birth control WITHOUT A COPAY, FOR FREE, because it is a necessary preventative medicine.  Meanwhile, I am paying $405 to ensure a hole is not burned through my esophagus, a friend can’t get insurance to cover her son’s speech therapy, and behavioral therapies for children struggling with the autism spectrum are RARELY covered…and yet, birth control is essential? 
ARE YOU FREAKING KIDDING ME???  There is a sure proof, though sometimes difficult way to prevent pregnancy, one.doesn’t.have.sex.  It works.  NFP, as I am sure you all know, is more effective than artificial birth control (though does require that 5-10 days, depending on your cycle, you cannot engage in sex a month).
Current administration?  Do people really believe the things you say?  The answer, sadly, yes.

5^th- The Church will.not. provide directly/indirectly birth control/sterilization for the employees of Her institutions.

Something that is getting lost, sadly, in this debate, is that it is not really a debate.  This is not a political talking point that people can have opinions on.  This is not something that the administration can ‘convince’ the American people of.  The American Catholic Church, through institutions that choose to remain loyal to her, will NOT follow this mandate.  That might seem surreal to some of you, and some of you may not believe me, but it is true.  So, although, ‘Catholic experts’ on CNN can speculate that the church will decide to fall in line, I can tell you right now, She will not.  And that my friends, is a hopeful point that we are sometimes forgetting to mention.

WHEW!  That really was a book, but I had to get it out. And now I feel better. Thank you and God bless.

IT FINALLY HAPPENED...

At 9.5 months, Aaron Christopher Wilkerson II has cut his first bottom tooth.  Rock on little man.

10 Interesting Things...

...Happening in the Wilkerson household

ONE

Aaron 2.0 has reached a crud ton of milestones. He crawls, walks holding on to stuff, claps, mimics, and continues to break his mom and dad’s hearts with his crazy cuteness.

TWO

 Just when we think we can’t stand the cuteness, he drives us crazy by ALWAYS finding the one thing in the house he can’t have and bee-lining towards it.  As I write this, he is getting through the chair barrier I have built for him by crawling through the legs. It is pretty much amazing. 

THREE

 Aaron Christopher Wilkerson the 1^st went on a ‘book buying’ extravaganza.  He never buys anything for himself, so that is just lovely. I have also never known him to finish a book, so as the piles of books continue to be delivered to our house, I do wonder what, exactly, he was thinking.

FOUR

Valentine’s Day in the Wilkerson was lovely.  We are on a tight budget, and so we had to be creative.  I got Aaron his favorite deliciousness of Corn Beef Sandwich, Asiago Dip and delicious drink.  In addition, a Dave Ramesy desk calendar (we are SUCH losers) and this little ‘Book of Love’ I made. I thought it was awesome and there was no way he could outdo me.  Well, I was wrong. He showed up with not only flowers, but with six different take-out items from six of my favorite restaurants.  In this pregnancy, I have had an aversion to food again (I have lost a pound since finding out I was with child), so having all of my favorites for dinner was INCREDIBLE.  To end the night, we watched, ‘Breaking Dawn’ together. It amuses me, how much my husband loves those movies.  He literally ‘giggled’ out loud a few times (will he kill me for writing that?- certainly). I continue to be amazed at the amount of Catholic friends I have that find the series morally objectionable. Not only does it have a strong, ‘waiting till marriage’ story-line but also a HUGE prolife storyline.  We loved it.

FIVE

I continue to give talks/retreats and workshops on a variety of topics.  Everything from Social Networking, to Young Women’s Ministry, to Faith and Bible matters.  This weekend Aaron and I will be tag-teaming a talk on the vocation of Marriage.  I get so much LIFE out of those things and I truly feel like I am called to speak with young people…but alas, I continue to discern what place it has in my life.  Currently, I will only do 2 outside things a month, to preserve my marriage and motherhood.  But, when I do, there is SUCH positive feedback and I love it so much, prayers appreciated for what role God would like retreats/talks/workshops to have in my life.

SIX

We find out next Monday if the baby we are cookin’ is a girl or a boy. I go back and forth, and either would be such a blessing to our family.  Though, I must admit, thinking about decorating a girl’s nursery puts little hearts in my eyes  :)

SEVEN 

 My sister Annie turned 18 on Sunday.  Which means, finally, all of my parent’s children are adults.  Pretty amazing…raising children for 35 years.  Everyday I think about how blessed I was to get the parents I did, especially now that I am one.

EIGHT

The other day, Aaron and I got in a squabble (shocking, I know)…so, to bug him I not only used my debit card, but I used it to buy starbucks (a double mortal sin in the world of budgeting).  Of course, he discovered it right after.  Note to Self- eventually husband will figure out you used bank card and after you make up, will force you to take the money that you wasted out of another part of the budget (like going out money). ARGH!

NINE

 I am on VACATION NEXT WEEK! The teens have midwinter break, and I decided I could use a midwinter break to.  The plan is to bond with the baby and to clean the guest room, which we have been throwing junk in since Christmas.

TEN

 One week and 2 days until our Winter-Wonderland-Mini-Vacation to the most perfect cabin on the west side of the state.  I am so looking forward to 3 days with good friends, lots of board games, a fireplace and certainly a crud ton of laughter!

Happy WednesdayJ

Evangelizing the Digital World...

...according to me (this one is long, grab a cup of coffee)

       

The last few weeks have been nothing short of a roller coaster for faithful Catholics that pay attention to the news (actually, to all people who pay attention to the news).  As a consequence, my facebook has gotten a little, how you say, controversial.  I have been posting a lot of things and frankly, have taken some heat from it.  I made note of the fact that I have ‘lost’ a few fb friends because of it and it has got me thinkin’….so I decided to post my thoughts.

Those of you that know me, know that I am passionate about Social Media.  I give talks/workshops on it and consider it my duty to stay informed regarding what the Church is saying about Social media/what the Bishop’s are saying.  The Church overwhelming affirms the use of social media both for staying ‘connected’ (which might surprise people) and for evangelization.  The Holy Father actually referred to Social Networking as ‘integral to the  human experience’ (gnaw on that FB haters!).  Facebook, in particular, has helped me with my job and kept me connected to my distant family in the best way possible (I regularly see pictures of my nieces/nephews in different states and get family updates in a super cool way).  Anyway, as a consequence I am 100% intentional about every single thing that I put on my social networking sites AND as a Catholic CYM, I spend a good deal of my time on these sites- in an effort to connect and bring the gospel message.  BUT, as of late, it has been hard.  I have received many a phone call saying,  ‘I think I am going to get rid of my facebook, it is just too hard to not comment on the trash people are putting up’, or, ‘It isn’t worth it to post about our beliefs, just to be slammed’, or, worse yet, ‘I don’t want to ‘jam’ my beliefs down someone else’s throat’.  And so my friends, here are my personal social networking guidelines, lest there be any confusion.

What I WILL DO:

I will always post if the Bishop’s are asking us to spread the word.
The HHS mandate is probably the most offensive thing to hit the Church and religious conscience in recent history.  All people of faith should be concerned; rather, all people that care about religious liberty should be concerned.  When the bishops ask us to spread the word about something, there is no better way than through social media avenues (just ask Bishop Coyne, Cardinal Elect Dolan, or Father Robert Barron).  On my FB wall, I freely and intentionally posted about it.  There was some very respectful debate, some really good questions and lots of affirmation.  However,  I am certain I lost at least 1 facebook friend over this one.  The bummer of this, is that this person is Catholic and a huge mentor to me.  But, alas, Jesus never promised us that all people will always like us. 

I will always post pro-life things
The recent activity of the SGK organization and their link to planned parenthood has caused quite a Social Media stir.  I make no apologies for posting about these things, though I know they are hard for some people to see.  People that are pro-life have an issue with planned parenthood not because of the ‘good’ that they do, but because part of their business (whether 3% or 9%) is killing babies.  Now, pro-life people are all over the board with this one, but most believe that abortion is taking a human life.  If we really believe that, all the ‘good’ that planned parenthood does, is far outweighed by the bad.  If one disagrees, that is just fine, but let me say one more thing to help people understand.  If pro-choice people knew that a company was killing 5 year olds (over 250,000 a year), they wouldn’t care about the ‘good’ that the company was doing.  One might not agree that abortion is killing, however, at least looking at it that way, one can see why, ‘all the good’ planned parenthood does…actually doesn’t matter to the convicted pro-life person.  THAT is why I have and will continue to post about abortion/planned parenthood.

I will make good use of the unsubscribe button and encourage you to
Facebook takes so many ‘hits’ from people, but the great thing is…they really set up their social networking site to allow for the most pleasurable viewing experience.  If my posts offend you, please feel free to ‘unsubscribe’. That doesn’t mean you have to remove me from your friends (for that would be quite intolerant), it doesn’t mean you have to be mean... just don’t look at it.  Trust me, I do it to people all.the.time.  I cannot possibly ‘jam my views down your throat’ if you have the ability to unsubscribe from me.

I will always be respectful
You will NEVER find anything on my facebook that is disrespectful to people.  There might be articles that disagree with the view’s of others, but I draw the line at disrespect.  In my comments, last week, someone said something regarding the HHS mandate about our ‘piece of sh—president’.  It was immediately removed.  I don’t tolerate language like that AND I don’t think it is helpful.

I will always remember the impression I am giving others
My life should be a witness of love.  Therefore my social networking sites should be a witness of love.  If I lose charity in the way that I am speaking, the things that I am saying, the points I am trying to make…then I have lost any ability to spread God. Because, my friends, God IS LOVE!  I will say, this is the one thing that irks me about ‘like-minded’ people. I see their fb posts, and I see no love, no compassion, no kindness.  That, my friends, is NOT Jesus.  AND, one can spread truth in LOVE, even in the digital world, if you need tips, I am willing to shareJ  I am not saying I am always 100% perfect at this, but I am intentional about trying to be.

What I WILL NOT do

 I will not allow pointless debates
The back and forth about certain topics will sometimes be stopped on my posts.  It is not because I am  ‘unwilling to hear’ the other side.  It is because facebook debates often turn ugly.  As with any social media, the danger is that people will write things that they would NEVER say in person.  Respect, love and true evangelization is lost.  And, the great thing is FB gives me the power to stop a thread or delete comments…I have no problem doing so.

I will not post things I know will be personally hurtful to others, even if I feel justified in doing so.
I am often shocked by certain posts that people throw up on their walls. And I am going to be really specific about what I am thinking. I am a Catholic, I love every.single.one of the Church’s teachings…however- there are certain teachings that need to be so filled love when explaining and most of these have to do with sexuality.  A priest once told me that the moments when you see Christ in his greatest compassion have to do with sexuality/sexual sin.  I was amazed by that.  Maybe next time when you want to post about the abomination of same-sex marriage, you should consider that…I’m just sayin’

I will never post about political things on my wall
Never will you find, on my wall, an endorsement of a particular candidate or a particular way of thinking because of my public role as a Church worker.  GOD is NOT a republican and there are plenty of things within the Republican party that the Church doesn’t dig.  God is NOT a democrat and there are plenty of things within the democratic party that the Church doesn’t dig.  Each Catholic needs to decide for themselves (guided by church documents) what issues the Church puts the most ‘weight on’ and then vote accordingly, but I promise, we are not allowed to say definitively that God would FAVOR a particular candidate- we just aren’t (at least in our public roles as Church workers).  I have been accused of being a ‘crazy conservative’ on my fb wall…to that I challenged, ‘find me something that is ‘crazy conservative’.  And people couldn’t. I love my Church and I am crazy pro-life, but other than that, when I speak ‘politically; on social networking walls, I speak from the mind of the Church, not as a party platform cheerleader! (side-note I have posted ‘political’ things on other’s walls if I think they will enjoy it…why?  Because I am nice!)

I will never slam our current president
I will criticize the current administration’s decisions if they go against the Church’s beliefs (notice I said the Church, not mine) but on Social Networking sites, you will never see me ‘slam’ the current president or president’s past.  It is inappropriate for a Church worker to do that, so I don’t.  Don’t believe me?  Go back and check!

I will never allow disrespectful comments on my FB  wall
If someone is disrespectful to my Church or my person, I will not allow it.  Cyber-bullying occurs with adults to, and I have ZERO tolerance for it.  A few days ago, I posted that I had just ‘deleted’ a ‘fb friend’ on one of my threads.  This person came  first attacked the church (not criticized, not asked a question, but attacked).  When I removed that comment, he attacked me.  So, I deleted him as a ‘friend’ and was criticized for it.  What those of you that might have questioned that move don’t know is that I inboxed this person and have gone back and forth in a respectful/but not public way.  If you show me that you cannot be trusted to post in respect on my wall, because of my decision to ‘allow’ teen friends, you will be removed as my friend. Simple as that. I don’t mess around with such things.

That is all.

I know this is a book but understand, I am passionate about social networking and the GOOD it provides. I get discouraged by the ‘haters’ of social networking and those that are frustrated with me/what I post. 

Have a happy Monday, I shall be posting more positive things on this blog later in the week. Rock on rockstars.