This one will probably tick everyone off...

...but it has to be said.
To my prolife friends

YOU SUCK.  WE, PROLIFERS, COLLECTIVELY SUCK at getting our point across.  Watch this video when you have time (it is long, but awesome).  Do you see how his arguments are not refutable?  Do you see how he changes minds? 

Here is the bottom line.  Abortion is still legal in this country because of prolifers.  It is still legal in this country because we get so passionate about the horror that we forget to teach effectively.  Lemme tell you something, if a teacher was teaching to a class of fourth graders, and 45-50% of them did not understand what the teacher was saying…it would NOT be the student's fault.  The beauty of the message of life is that it is good, it is easy to understand and it is logical.  But often, for the sake of ‘shocking’ or ‘spreading the truth’, we don’t spread our message effectively.  A bloody torn apart baby, seen on a sign, as one of my pro-choice friends drives by, DOES NOT make them want to be pro-life. It has changed exactly no hearts, ever (of those I know) because it is polarizing, it dehumanizes the child that was murdered, and it closes hearts to the message.

When a teenager is murdered through violence, you DO NOT see a picture of their bloody corpse.  Generally, you see a picture of them looking their best, their most youthful, and THAT pulls at heartstrings.  That opens people’s hearts to the senselessness of violent death, and convicts people to want to create change.  How about we take that as a sign? 

How about we start showing mothers with their children instead?  How about we ask for witnesses? People who have made the tough choice to allow their child to live, despite their fears?  How about we celebrate the teenager who is pregnant and made the ‘choice’ to allow their child to live? How about we do that in our social circles, rather than gossip about the fact that they are ‘knocked up’?  How about we acknowledge that poverty is linked to abortion and we MUST address poverty and work towards a society where mothers feel cared for and loved? 

These things we MUST start doing. There is no reason, in this country, in this world, abortion should be legal. There is NO reason we should be losing this fight.  Let’s learn how to LISTEN and then how to TALK to others.  Let’s learn how to stop certain things from being said (‘I am personally prolife, but can’t tell another not to kill their child’).  Let’s stop pursuing ways of hearing a truth we are already convicted of,  ways that are effective only for ‘us’. Instead let’s learn how to pursue ways of teaching a truth that others can be open to (that was a big sentence, not sure if it makes sense).

To my prochoice friends…

1 thing you must stop saying

You must stop saying, ‘I would never have an abortion, but it is not my place to tell someone what to do with their body’.  Here is why. 

It is NOT a logical argument. And it drives me bat crud crazy.  If YOU would not have an abortion, I am guessing it is because you find it morally unacceptable.  I am also going to guess that you find it morally unacceptable because it is taking life.  And, my prochoice friends, we ARE allowed to tell people that they cannot take life, if we, indeed believe it is the taking life.  We do it every day.  YOU do it every day.  You support laws that tell people that they cannot steal, they cannot kill other citizens, and they cannot harm others.  We say that people cannot abuse children, cannot burn buildings down, cannot speed, etc…

It would be RIDICULOUS for me to say, ‘I, personally, would never go 100 miles an hour down the highway during rush hour, but it is not my place to tell another individual that they can’t’.  We wouldn’t say that, because it DOES.NOT.MAKE.SENSE.  So, if you must insist on being prochoice, just please, please, please stop saying that.  Please.  It drives me bat crud crazy because it DOES NOT make any sense. Good? Okay. Next point.

You HAVE to be consistent.

This is going to be hard for my prochoice and my prolife friends to read, but it must be said.  Recently, in the news, there have been plenty of stories about ‘after-birth abortions’ or ‘infantacide’.  Both my prochoice and my prolife friends have acted horrified by this notion.  My prochoice friends get nervous…they could be compared to someone who would kill an ‘actual child’.  My prolife friends act like we ‘could be headed there any day’, and thus, they are horrified. 

Here is the deal. We are there. 

And this, my friends is where it gets tough…
there is NO DIFFERENCE between abortion in the womb and after birth abortion.  To be quite honest, both lives are unsustainable without the help of the mother or others.  A baby is not able to live on his/her own life until they are probably around 5 or 6 years of age, and even then it would be extremely difficult.  As biology tells us, the moment the egg and the sperm meet, life begins to grow.  Cell begin to duplicate and the ‘fetus’ begins to thrive.  This is a FACT.  Check out this cool video (not factual) that is fun to watch to see how ‘life’ happens.  SO…my prochoice friends, after fertilization, if one kills the ‘fetus’, one is killing growing life.  One might use the argument that at different points in the growth process it is no longer okay to kill, but who gets to decide?  The most consistent pro-choice folks I have ever met argue for ‘after birth abortions’ or ‘infanticide’. And, although I am horrified at their thought process (especially considering they would deem it morally acceptable to kill my son), I do give them kudos for being CONSISTENT.  And for making sense.  If you are going to allow for the killing of life at any point, based on the non-viability of the ‘fetus’- you necessarily have to carry that through.  Just because my newborn might be cuter than the child growing in my four month pregnant neighbor, does not make my newborn any more able to sustain his/herself outside the womb.  And so, friends, all I ask is that if you are going to have those beliefs, you TRULY understand what you are stating. Then, own it, even if it is hard to own.  It brings a truth to the discussion.

Those are my thoughts, I am sure you have some too, but dang, that felt good to get off my chest (it has been stewing for at least four months).

(photos by Russ Wasylyshyn)