letlovebesincere: "I can't remember all the times..."

"...I tried to tell myself to hold on to these moments as they pass" (thank you Adam Duritz)

Monster Jam!

Yesterday, Little Aaron was able to go to ‘Monster Jams’ with Big Aaron as a special treat. They went downtown to Ford field. For the last three weeks, it was pretty much the only thing sweet little dude would talk about. “Ipad” time in the morning, consisted pretty much solely of watching Monster Jam videos on youtube, over and over and over again. He was super geeked up to see his favorite cars and was ready and prepared for the noise level. I was so excited for him.

Joey realizing he wasn't going

Joey and I said goodbye and Joey completely lost his mind when he realized all this monster jam stuff would not be for him as well. After they left, the little dude and I sang songs, read books and then I put him to bed. And then, for the next two hours, I tried so hard not to text- stalk my husband to see how it was going because I wanted them both to stay in the moment.
We considered having the whole family go (sans JP of course). But it would have been quite the investment and we were fairly certain Joey would not be pleased by the sound level. And so it was decided that Big Aaron would take him solo. A daddy/son date. They were both pretty excited, but you know what? It kind of sucked staying behind.

It kind of sucked knowing that lil’ Aaron was going to be experiencing something super cool, and I wouldn’t be there to experience it with him. He was going to be creating a memory, he was going to be so excited, and I would only be able to look at pictures from the evening.

Apparently, lil' A wasn't able to pull his eyes away!

When it got close to the time they were going to be home, I sat by the window, so anxious to hear about how their special trip went. It was so exciting when they came home. First I had to hear about the fries and coke that daddy bought him, but then I heard all about Monster Jams. He was spent from how much fun it was. And I was so excited for him. I looked at the pictures daddy took (praise you Jesus, my husband took a lot of pictures for me) and realized my little dude really is growing up.

It’s funny being a mom.

Even in moments of pure joy, there can be seconds of melancholic sadness.
Sadness realizing your kid is growing up. Sadness realizing there will be MANY things your children will experience without you. I had a bit of reflection as I waited by the window for Big A’s car to show up and my boy to jump out of the car and tell me all about his fantastic adventure.

I was keenly aware I will probably sit on that same couch, waiting for my sons to come home from all different sorts of adventures, adventures they will take without me.

I watched a movie a couple weeks ago. Call me shallow (I’ll take it) but it was one of the better movies I have seen in my lifetime. It was called ‘About Time’. I don’t want to spoil it, but the ‘lesson’ at the end was fantastic! It reminded that every second you live, is the last time you will ever live that second…so make sure to make it good. Today, is the last time time JP will be his age. Today is the last time Joey will smile in the way he is smiling today. Today, is the last time lil’ A will sit by me exactly as he is right now, on his belly, watching monster jam videos, while gently kicking his legs and hitting my arm. We won’t have these moments again.

Right before he left me for 'all the fun"

So, it’s important to live them.

Yesterday, in my son and husband’s joy, I was VERY aware at how fast it is going by and how special it is. And the need to savor the moments we are together, because there will be many, many moments when we are not.

Happy Sunday friends. Hug your kids!